Welcome back to another episode of Enni Pretending to be an Old Hat! Although, on the plus side, it is a magical hat. That every head in Hogwarts has touched. Blrgh. But anyway, if you’ll recall, a few months back or something like that I did a post on A Hogwarts Sorting of LOTR Characters. Today, I’m back with another popular fandom: Hamilton.
Before we get started, I’m just going to note the basics: You can have your own opinions, that’s fine, but I mean it’s a Hogwarts sorting. Nothing to die over. This is also strictly based on the characters in the musical, not actual history. And, none of the gifs are mine. Now we have those boring disclaimers over, let’s move on!
Oh, and also because the character list is SO LONG, I’ve decided to split it up into two parts. Today I’m doing part 1, which stars the main characters. I defined that as people who had at least one song (somewhat) to themselves and appeared more than once.
ALEXANDER HAMILTON

Bah. For Alexander, I pretty much felt like he could have fit into any of the houses…except for Hufflepuff. He is 100% not a Hufflepuff. But Gryffindor? Yes. Slytherin? Yes. Ravenclaw? YES. But, ultimately, I ended up choosing…
Because, I mean…let’s go over his basic character. He’s willing to do what it takes to survive, set on leaving a legacy (poor Eliza), ambitious in every sense of the word, and altogether, Slytherin seemed like a pretty good fit for him. Of course, there was also his insane genius which made me consider Ravenclaw, but the motives behind his work felt much more Slytherin to me. So, there you have it.
AARON BURR
This one was easy enough, so I don’t need to write as long of an intro. 😛
Burr and Hamilton are different kinds of Slytherin to me. Hamilton being slightly less sane. But Burr is the cool, calculating Slytherin. Though, calculating doesn’t seem to be the right word. Also, what other house could you possibly put Burr in?
ELIZA SCHUYLER/HAMILTON
Here’s a character who I thought would be easy but ended up not being so. When you first look at Eliza, you think “HUFFLEPUFF”. At least, I did. But when I looked in further, well, suddenly I wasn’t so sure. I’d say that Eliza would be a house stall between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, but this old hat finally decided:
Because, how could you not? A stanza in Satisfied is literally based on what a cinnamon roll Eliza is. XD Also, being loyal, kind, and steadfast (though absolutely willing to burn you if necessary) she seemed like a pretty good Hufflepuff to me.
ANGELICA SCHUYLER
ANOTHER hat stall. Good grief people, stop being so complex and well-developed. It makes old hats have a much easier life. *nod* Angelica was a stall between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Slytherin because of all that ambition and resourcefulness, and Ravenclaw because she’s the OLDEST AND WITTIEST AND THE GOSSIP IN NEW YORK CITY IS INSIDIOUS.
Sometimes I still look back and wonder if I made the right choice. I take these things seriously, all right? Slytherin seemed like such a good choice since she’s so very ambitious but at the same time I couldn’t help leaning towards Ravenclaw. Ultimately, though, Ravenclaw was what I decided ’cause come on, think about it. XD
GEORGE WASHINGTON
Good ol’ George Washington. I really don’t have a ton for the intro, so I guess I’ll just be making up stuff as I go along. XD I knew that he wasn’t a Slytherin…just because…he wasn’t, he might have been a Ravenclaw but I sort of doubted it, and as for Hufflepuff? Meh. If you do some basic math, there’s four houses and I eliminated three. Which means…what’s left?
Being a leader, general (and eventually president), and having courage and chivalry, Gryffindor seemed like it’d be a pretty good fit for him. I don’t imagine him being one of those crazy, reckless Gryffindors though. I picture him…more as a laid-back Gryffindor who’s unafraid to take charge but won’t be taking unnecessary risks.
THOMAS JEFFERSON
Do you ever have that feeling when you look at a person and just feeling that they’re so inherently a house? No? Perhaps it’s just a trait that runs in old hats. But anyway, that’s what I felt for Thomas Jefferson. To make the intro a bit longer, I’m just going to add that that is such a glorious gif above.
Yup. I’m sure that Thomas could have been a Slytherin, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff…*snickers* actually, nah. Maybe not the last one. But you know what, I just look at Thomas Jefferson and think, “There’s a Ravenclaw right there”. Maybe I’m wrong and you in fact, do think that he is a very big Hufflepuff! If so, then…welp.
PHILLIP HAMILTON
First of all, WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY GLORIOUS GIF. Second of all, gahh another hat stall between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. Maybe hat stalls run in the family. Very bad Schuyler genetics. Stop being so darned hard to sort!
I ended up taking him the same direction as Eliza. When he *spoiler* challenged Eacker to a duel, it seemed like a pretty big Gryffindor thing to do. Dueling somebody because honor and chivalry blah blah blah. But honestly, I can’t look at Phillip and think, “HE’S A GRYFFINDOR”. To be perfectly honest, I went with my gut. Great.
Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette
I know I didn’t have to put in his full name, but honestly it was kind of fun. XD I know you’re probably thinking, “What about Mulligan? And Laurens?” because I can’t be the only one who associates them all in a little trio. But neither of those two really had a song to themselves, and then…there was Guns and Ships. So, you see.
Here’s a textbook Gryffindor. Brave, courageous, slightly on the wild side…what a stereotypical Gryffindor. He’s also another character who I had a strong gut feeling about, so yup.
PHEW. gasp That was a very long post. But hopefully, that was fun for you to read. 😀 It certainly was to write! If you have any disagreement on a certain sorting, feel free to say so in the comments and we can duel to the death on it.
Actually, that’s probably illegal nowadays. Unless we go to Jersey. Since, of course, everything’s legal in Jersey.
I’ll leave you now with one final Hamilton gif. 🙂 I hope you have a wonderful week!
Do you say Lafayette laff-e-a or laff-e-ette?
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ah I love this musical! Great post!
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clap clap I need to watch. now. soon.
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ahhhhhhhhgh now I just wanna watch the musical. XD
ALSO GENIUS
Also lovely
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